What provokes anger? What is the body's natural response to this provocation? It is helpful to be able to answer these questions in order to develop good management skills.
Anger is precipitated by the body's natural chemical responses to increased physical arousal, emotions, and accompanying behaviors. This occurs when a person perceives a threat or loss. It can be a threat of physical harm or to a person's self-esteem if they believe their feelings are being challenged or discounted.
The body naturally responds to any perceived threat by producing adrenalin to prepare for "fight or flight." The way a person responds is due mainly to how they have been conditioned as a child or learned later in life. These responses can be positive or negative, depending on the individual.
For example, abuse victims often are conditioned to respond violently, having learned verbal, mental, or physically abusive behaviors from others. They have not learned any positive management techniques.
Everyone has triggers that set off angry responses.
Here are the most common reasons people become angry:
- When someone hurts or betrays them, and they feel a loss of trust
- When they believe their feelings are discounted, and their sense of self esteem is compromised
- When values are threatened (disagreeing with something someone is doing, such as kicking a dog, or not following the rules)
- When someone insists they do something they do not want to do
- When expectations are not met (whether realistic or unrealistic) and they don't get their way
- When they attempt to escape guilty feelings over something they do not want to feel or admit to themselves.
Recognizing what initiates your anger, or "pushes your buttons" is the first step toward implementing good management techniques. Rather than exploding, or reacting badly, try to recognize the signs that you are getting angry, such as:
- Clenching of fist or jaw
- Buzzing sound in your ears
- Headache or dizziness
- Heart Pounding
- Sweating, especially sweaty palms
- Tunnel vision
When you are able to recognize the signs from the onset, you can take control of the situation instead of letting the situation control you. After the initial adrenaline rush of passes, you are more likely to respond with proactive, good management techniques, such as discussion or distancing yourself from the people or events you know will provoke your anger.
